JENSEN, nicolas

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23 YEARS - MALE - 5 FEET 11 IN - DEMISEXUAL - NORTHERN SOLDIER
ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE/END OF DAYS


"dad, how do soldiers killing each other solve the world's problems?"[/font][/size][/center]

LIKES & DISLIKES

✓ his father - the man has been deceased for many years now, but nicolas still idolizes him. the fallen man is the sole reason he keeps fighting every day.
✓ strong whiskey - what's better than getting shitfaced drunk after a crappy day full of killing people and watching zombies eat the carcasses? it's nice to forget.
✓ the little things - what nicolas has learned is that you're going to be pretty damn miserable unless you learn to appreciate the little things in life. you know, that last can of old beans, or the spec of blue sky between the puffs of smog.
✓ a good meal - there is absolutely nothing better than a good meal, and he can be somewhat greedy when it comes to food, often sneaking more than his fair share.
✓ making people smile - he's got a stellar sense of sarcasm and isn't afraid to crack a bad joke every now and then. he loves seeing people crack a smile, and if it means he has to make a fool out of himself to see it, then so be it.
✓ being the hero - he wants to be a hero, not a villain. he doesn't want to destroy, he wants to save. he prefers playing the 'medic' and rescuing his fallen comrades rather than shooting to kill. heroes save lives, not take them.
✓ proving himself - yes, he knows that his comrades snicker about his 'naive fantasies' when they think he's not in earshot, and because of this, he goes above and beyond to prove his worth and courage. he's just as good, dammit.
✓ making a difference - like most soldiers, he wants to make a difference in the world. however, he doesn't wish to fire the winning shot in the war like most dream about – he wants to stop it. he knows it's far from possible, but he longs for peace.

✗ being mocked - hey, just because you're a cold-hearted ass with no hope for the future doesn't mean you can laugh at him to make yourself feel better. got it?
✗ pain - in those old war movies he'd always see that one guy who took a bullet to the chest and kept on fighting, but he has learned reality is much different. i mean, he got shot in the arm once and was practically rolling on the ground.
✗ killing zombies - ok, so, call of duty was fun and all – until it became real life. really, he'd much rather be holding a game controller than an actual loaded gun.
✗ being underestimated - his sanity and compassion are frowned upon and seen as a weakness, and there's nothing he hates more than being ridiculed about it.
✗ the sight of blood - despite the amount of casualties and deaths he has witnessed over the years, he has only been on the battlefield for a few months, and the sight of spilled blood and dead bodies still makes him feel sick to his stomach.
✗ letting someone down - there's honestly nothing worse than that look of utter disappointment when he cannot meet someone's expectations.
✗ taking a life - every time he kills a man, his soul tears a little more. most soldiers have become numb to such gory deeds, but nicolas' conscience is still very much intact. he only pulls the trigger when he deems it absolutely necessary.
✗ being in charge - oh, please, don't do that. he'd much rather be a follower than a leader. he needs to be told what to do or he feels completely lost in the frenzy.


PERSONALITY

people say that miracles don't happen anymore, but nicolas is living proof that they do. really, the fact that he's still alive is a rather shocking miracle in itself, seeing as the man is far from strategic and a complete klutz. then again, believe it or not, his unsteady feet are what have saved his ass on numerous occasions. you know, the typical trip on air and happen to dodge a bullet trick.

despite the hardening world around him, nicolas' heart is still soft and vulnerable. he doesn't see people as targets, but rather victims of war, and he has retained the compassion of humanity that so many others have lost in the bloodshed. he is reliable and highly loyal to those who fight on his own side. rather than shoot, he prefers to play the role of the 'medic,' dragging injured comrades off the battlefield to safety. he feels more productive this way, saving a life instead of taking one.

nicolas is ever the optimist, and if the zombie apocalypse can't crush someone's naive hopes, nothing can. the world is crumbling around to pieces him, coming closer to its end every day, but he somehow manages to believe in a better tomorrow. no, he doesn't think that slaughtering men or experimenting on innocent civilians is the answer, but maybe, just maybe, if they all decided to work together—

yeah, it's hopeless.

still, even if his ideas are mocked, nicolas knows this isn't the way to move forward. instead of helping humanity, the soldiers are pushing them closer to extinction. sometimes he wants to abandon his post, but he his conflicted views keep him in line. growing up, his father was his role model and hero, and while he never understood what good killing did, his father had always told him the men in suits were the 'good guys.' the trouble is, now everyone is in suits, and nicolas isn't sure who to aim his gun at anymore. sometimes he thinks about pointing the weapon at his own head. he has come close on a few occasions, but shame has stopped him.

this being said, defeating the southern troops seems to be the only way forward, and so he pushes on, resolute in his march. he is an extraordinarily stubborn individual, and while he may not agree with the approach being taken, if it is the only possibility to achieve peace, he will do everything in his power to complete his mission. he is often underestimated by the other troops, his sanity and strength of heart seen as a weakness, and this never fails to grate on his nerves.


THE STORY SO FAR

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"dad, how do soldiers killing each other solve the world's problems?"

"they don't, son ― they make them worse."

"then why do you fight?"

"we have to."

as a young boy, nicolas was forced to ask himself this question every day. why? why must his beloved father go and fight? why did anyone have to fight? in primary school they had always told him that fighting was wrong. in fact, nicolas still remembers the day he hit another boy with his toy truck and was put in timeout for an hour.

so, why?

unfortunately, he never got an answer to this question, at least not one that he liked, and when he was twelve years old, his father was killed in a battle overseas. the death of his guardian and cherished role-model devastated the young boy. his mother had passed away in childbirth, and so he was forced to go live with his aunt. she was a nice woman, and she did try, but nicolas never saw her in the same light as his dear father. the hole in his heart was never quite filled again.

coincidentally, only four years later, when nicolas was sixteen years old, the war came to his homeland. he will never forget the sound of jet engines overhead or the sinister whistle of missiles dropping. the schools closed and he never saw any of his friends again. life as he knew it ended.

only months later, an outbreak of an unidentified virus wreaked havoc on the city, something you'd only see in the most gruesome of horror films. many families tried to flee their homeland only to be quarantined by soldiers of the ruthless southern faction. there were rumors that some were being used as 'test subjects.'

this went on for years, and soon the land was plunged into disease and poverty. after his aunt was infected by the virus, nicolas left the city and managed to make it to the safe zone, where he lived until he was twenty years old. that's when it happened – he was drafted to fight in the war. seemingly overnight, his life turned into 'call of duty,' and a gun nearly half his size was thrust into his hands.

he has been on the force for three years now, however, majority of that time he's spent training. he was only recently dispatched onto the battlefield to fight with the big boys. it's a miracle nicolas has made it this long, as his heart is too gentle for such a harsh world. after killing his first man, he had a horrible breakdown, and while his comrades have become desensitized to the ongoing violence, it still wrenches his heart in the most painful of ways. surely mindless murder cannot be the cure for the famine and death that plagues the land, can it?

many would call nicolas naive, so he keeps these thoughts to himself, knowing a single man will never be able to make a difference, no matter how desperately he wishes he could. he would have abandoned his position by now, but the soldiers take care of him, and he has developed brotherly bonds with some of the men. that, and really, he just wants to do a good job and make his deceased father proud.


OTHER INFO[/font]

he wears both his father's old dog tags and his own, and while he often questions the integrity of his fellow soldiers, he keeps fighting because he wants to follow in his beloved father's footsteps, as the man was his one, true role model. he doesn't want to be a coward and run away from the duties he has been granted.


FACE CLAIM[/font]

spain from hetalia


YOUR ALIAS[/font]

alex
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